I have shared my testimony so many times in the past 5 months that now it almost feels like a routine sales pitch and the product is salvation....and that's exactly what i didn't want to happen...its amazing how iv managed to turn something that God has done in my life from mind boggling to cliche...I mean not only did he purchase my debt with his his blood he also took my place suffered the wrath of God... all while i the guilty walks away guiltless...amazing right? no its ATONEMENT...Gods grace and mercy...TRUE LOVE that saw fit to break the chains of homosexuality and hypocrisy in my life... all while building me up and and fulfilling scripture...but somewhere between me coming to Christ and purchasing my first ex shirt i lost sight of just how wonderful and truly honorable what took place on the cross really is...it took me a while to notice it of course ...i mean with all the church services and notes... the edifying fellowship... my band against secular music... i was fully convinced that i truly understood what the cross meant...but after several missed devotions and a recent convicting sermon on dedication i realized that my christian walk has become a sales pitch...see like a salesman i am familiar with the product... but i am so focused on trying to convince others to purchase... i never allow myself time to appreciate what the product can do for me in my life... and because its just a job and not a lifestyle and i still have to pay bills i have managed to pledge allegiance to other products in my personal life that i feel could do the same thing but be cheaper....have i lost you yet? i hope not but its like the fact that Jesus Christ has delivered me from so much is only thought about when I'm about to go witness and I'm sure not only did he deliver me from self destruction and eternal damnation so i can be a living testimony of his wondrous glory to others but he also did it so that i could remember who he is and how through him all things are made new....and lately i have been so consumed and focus on sharing my testimony with others I myself am no longer moved by it...i allowed my Testimony and all its power be drowned out by a few " God is greats" and " Girl let me tell you how God delivered me" that i was no longer moved by my own deliverance... and that's a harsh reality i didn't want to face until now... iv realized i was more dedicated to sharing my testimony then i was praising the one who gave me a testimony... true Pharisee... i guess now i can rock my EX-PHARISEE with all truth... its just crazy how i became more like a Pharisee after i bought my Ex-Pharisee shirt... the dope thing is even this is a testimony!!!! GOD IS SO DOPE!!!!
adt...
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